The Spirit of Lights

So today I actually began to have an inkling of Christmas spirit. This morning I was feeling down for missing church and I had a headache. I thought I had wasted my sunday and the rest of my weekend. My bla attitude continued into the afternoon and devoured my normal upbeat personality. That all changed with a lit up nativity and Christmas songs around a bonfire. Let me explain. So after shooting some firearms at targets to relieve the frustration of that dud seahawks game, everybody got together and we went to the Lights of Christmas at Warm Beach. Even though it was raining when we got there and I still had said bla attitude, once I saw all the astounding and beautifully colored lights and ultimately the lit up nativity, my mood changed. I felt like my Christmas spirit that had been dormant and buried since well last Christmas was awoken in me and it was a great feeling. I had the urge to sing Christmas songs, watch the carolers and look at all the lights and arrangements (which mind you were amazing) and ultimately share in the joy and infect others with some. We had a little bit of time to pray at the prayer chapel there and I was able to lift some more of my burdens to God which was reassuring. I went through the rest of the night with that renewed sense of spirit and started to enjoy what this time of year is really about. I can totally see how people can be depressed during the holidays and I was getting close myself. But it’s amazing how a little holiday themed fun can turn your mood around, sing Joy to the World and Jingle bells a few times and youll have a hard time frowning. Just thinking about all the people that got to enjoy my dreadful voice tonight, I think I am going to fall asleep with a smile on my face.

The joy of service

Yesterday I volunteered to meet a need of a babysitter for a few hours for a few young boys while their mom and grandma do some Christmas shopping. Both these kids have a great amount of energy (especially the younger one). Even though I regreted that i should, I turned out having a great time with the kids. (We played every playground game in the book….) Anyways today got me thinking about what the the bible says about serving. So I cracked open Joshua. There is great knowledge in this passage and it is definatly  a part of the bible i draw from. Take a peek much luv and God bless.,

Joshua
Chapter 24

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Joshua gathered together all the tribes of Israel at Shechem, summoning their elders, their leaders, their judges and their officers. When they stood in ranks before God,
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1 Joshua addressed all the people: “Thus says the LORD, the God of Israel: In times past your fathers, down to Terah, father of Abraham and Nahor, dwelt beyond the River and served other gods.
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But I brought your father Abraham from the region beyond the River and led him through the entire land of Canaan. I made his descendants numerous, and gave him Isaac.
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To Isaac I gave Jacob and Esau. To Esau I assigned the mountain region of Seir in which to settle, while Jacob and his children went down to Egypt.
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“Then I sent Moses and Aaron, and smote Egypt with the prodigies which I wrought in her midst.
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Afterward I led you out of Egypt, and when you reached the sea, the Egyptians pursued your fathers to the Red Sea with chariots and horsemen.
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Because they cried out to the LORD, he put darkness between your people and the Egyptians, upon whom he brought the sea so that it engulfed them. After you witnessed what I did to Egypt, and dwelt a long time in the desert,
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I brought you into the land of the Amorites who lived east of the Jordan. They fought against you, but I delivered them into your power. You took possession of their land, and I destroyed them (the two kings of the Amorites) before you.
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Then Balak, son of Zippor, king of Moab, prepared to war against Israel. He summoned Balaam, son of Beor, to curse you;
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but I would not listen to Balaam. On the contrary, he had to bless you, and I saved you from him.
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Once you crossed the Jordan and came to Jericho, the men of Jericho fought against you, but I delivered them also into your power.
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2 And I sent the hornets ahead of you which drove them (the Amorites, Perizzites, Canaanites, Hittites, Girgashites, Hivites and Jebusites) out of your way; it was not your sword or your bow.
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“I gave you a land which you had not tilled and cities which you had not built, to dwell in; you have eaten of vineyards and olive groves which you did not plant.
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“Now, therefore, fear the LORD and serve him completely and sincerely. Cast out the gods your fathers served beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the LORD.
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3 If it does not please you to serve the LORD, decide today whom you will serve, the gods your fathers served beyond the River or the gods of the Amorites in whose country you are dwelling. As for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”
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But the people answered, “Far be it from us to forsake the LORD for the service of other gods.
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For it was the LORD, our God, who brought us and our fathers up out of the land of Egypt, out of a state of slavery. He performed those great miracles before our very eyes and protected us along our entire journey and among all the peoples through whom we passed.
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At our approach the LORD drove out (all the peoples, including) the Amorites who dwelt in the land. Therefore we also will serve the LORD, for he is our God.”
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4 Joshua in turn said to the people, “You may not be able to serve the LORD, for he is a holy God; he is a jealous God who will not forgive your transgressions or your sins.
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If, after the good he has done for you, you forsake the LORD and serve strange gods, he will do evil to you and destroy you.”
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But the people answered Joshua, “We will still serve the LORD.”
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Joshua therefore said to the people, “You are your own witnesses that you have chosen to serve the LORD.” They replied, “We are, indeed!”
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“Now, therefore, put away the strange gods that are among you and turn your hearts to the LORD, the God of Israel.”
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Then the people promised Joshua, “We will serve the LORD, our God, and obey his voice.”
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So Joshua made a covenant with the people that day and made statutes and ordinances for them at Shechem,
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which he recorded in the book of the law of God. Then he took a large stone and set it up there under the oak that was in the sanctuary of the LORD.
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And Joshua said to all the people, “This stone shall be our witness, for it has heard all the words which the LORD spoke to us. It shall be a witness against you, should you wish to deny your God.”
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Then Joshua dismissed the people, each to his own heritage.
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After these events, Joshua, son of Nun, servant of the LORD, died at the age of a hundred and ten.
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He was buried within the limits of his heritage at Timnath-serah in the mountain region of Ephraim north of Mount Gaash.
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Israel served the LORD during the entire lifetime of Joshua and that of the elders who outlived Joshua and knew all that the LORD had done for Israel.
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5 The bones of Joseph, which the Israelites had brought up from Egypt, were buried in Shechem in the plot of ground Jacob had bought from the sons of Hamor, father of Shechem, for a hundred pieces of money. This was a heritage of the descendants of Joseph.
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When Eleazar, son of Aaron, also died, he was buried on the hill which had been given to his son Phinehas in the mountain region of Ephraim.

The Real Legend

So tonight I went to see that new winter blockbuster movie “I am Legend” starring Will Smith and well a dog. From what little backround I know or heard, this movie was based on the Richard Matheson novel about the last living man on Earth when Every other man, woman, and child becomes a vampire from a supposed cure for cancer gone wrong. Anyway there is a part in the movie where smith’s character completely forsakes God for being the reason for another character being there to save him. He then gets angry and goes off about all of the bad things that has happened and the despair that the world is in. When I heard him rant I thought to myself wow the reason bad things happen in life is because at the root of our existance, man Chose sin and in this case with the movie, humans did this to themselves. They created a virus to do something good (cure cancer) but didn’t think things through and ended up infecting the whole population with this “turn you into a vampire” side effect. On a much smaller scale I think I can relate to the scientist and Nevelle’s (Will Smith’s character’s) reaction. I can think of many times I have turned away and forsaken God for the bad things that have happened in my life and I look back now on how foolish I was. God created us in mind that we could live with him in perfect harmony and well we screwed that up (read Genesis chapter 2 for more details). We now live in a fallen world because of it. However God was gracious enough to Send his son to die so we may be able to live with him in heaven. Now even thinking about it I am ashamed for how I felt for the hard times in my life. I mean think about it, God sent his son to die so we may live with him and in my selfish ways I turn around and blame him for things that ultimate I did and we as humans did while I should be praising him. Life is a gift and I am realizing that more and more each day. I am also realizing that I need to continually repent for the things that I have done. I am a work in progress but hopefully someday I will get there and be able to truly wholeheartedly give praise to the true legend JESUS CHRIST.

Miss Misunderstood

So if I had one word to describe today it would be unorthox. Today went the complete opposite of how I thought it was going to go. Days like these remind me that God must have a sense of humor. I went to bed pretty late last night and thought i wouldn’t wake up and be late for work. Well…I actually woke up early and got to work early. I was driving work thinking after I had such a fruitful day yesterday I would have a let down. It actually was another very fruitful day. After lunch I was thinking about how I had absolutely no plans for tonight and well I ended up doing something meaningful and somewhat impactful. This brings me back to the meaning of my title. I have a longtime friend who is a longtime Christian. I have known her since middle school. She loves the lord and has a call to be a missionary. Anyway long story short she is currently in a long distance relationship with another one of my friends who is in the army. She also goes way back with one of my good friends that I just so happen to live with. (weird right?) She has recently been feeling very lonely and I think very lost in her walk and I feel that she has had lack of guidance to to effectively deal with these “special” relationships. While I somewhat don’t agree fully with the way she goes about some things in her relationships, I do see the good intentions that she has. I think she just suffers though a ton of indecisiveness in her feelings and there have been problems as a result. Spending some time with her tonight confirmed with me that while she is dealing with many different feelings, God has a plan for this young woman and that I believe when everything is said and done, she will pull from her current experiences and be able to use those to be a vessel of wisdom for many young ladies. I know she has the heart for it I think that that heart just needs to be refined by the holy spirit and God will use her in many ways. As I end I pray that through these struggles that she comes to you lord for I know your calming presence will guide her through life and so that she can become the woman Of God that I know she is called to be.

Leaving on a New Journey

So today marks the day that a good friend of mine Jason is leaving to go back to his hometown in Oklahoma. He was up here as an intern of my church and has spent the last few months under the tutelage of some very Godly men. Jason is one of the most fun loving, God fearing humble people I have ever met. What impresses me more is that he is only 21. He is very mature for his age and always seems to come off as being very sincere and is a very smart guy. He is taking back a new and refined perspective on life and I know that he is going to make a necessary  impact on the people over there. Jason is a true missionary, always searching for answers looking for ways to help anyone when he can and he does it with a smile on his face. I know God has and will continually bless his life and he will make a impact. I have taken some of his wisdom from his short time here and I will always keep it with me. God Bless and this post is for you brother.

See you in the Summer.

The Painful Beginning

So to start off I am a Christian just to get that out of the way. I am 20 years old and my current occupation is a software consultant. I am currently renting a trailer on the property of my friends parents house (pathetic right). I kind of had a hard childhood growing up. I had an alcoholic father who passed away when I was 11 and a Bipolar mother. My brother also has some learning disabilities and has been diagnosed as bipolar as well. So as you could guess I am kinda screwed up. I am quite amazed sometimes how I am the only “normal” person in my immediate family and how incredible messed up I am myself sometimes. I skated through high school lacking motivation and application, people considered me the “smart kid” even though all said and done I ended up with like a 2.2 GPA. So I tryed out the community college route and realized pretty quick that it might not be for me. (again lack of motivation or drive) and I was stuck with a conundrum of what the heck am I going to do with my life. Up to the beginning of 2007 I had been working mostly retail and restaurant jobs with a stint as a executive assistant at a temp agency. So back to my current position I work at a company called Rain Networks as an accounts executive (I sell people software) besides the fact that recently it has been decently lucrative I am still not sold on if this what I am meant to do or should do for an extended period of time. But for right now it does more than pays the bills so I am not complaining too much. Ok so back to me being a Christian. I am currently plugged into what was The First Baptist Church of Snohomish which went through a merger with another congregation and is now The Bridge Church of Snohomish county. Name withstanding change has been paramount since the merger and everything. Right now I am involved in a “Millennium Group” basically it is a small group of people from 18 to their mid thirties mixed with some of my longtime friends and some acquaintances that have turned into good friends. We consider ourselves a group that is searching for the answers to this thing called life through the Bible and biblical teaching. It has been morphed and shaped recently with people leaving and coming but we have transformed into a core group of people that are broken or are in the process of breaking down in many different ways in our lives and through that brokenness we are trying to see God’s holy spirit shine through us. I bring this up because I know the sincerity of the other core people but in many ways I feel completly apart from God and what he wants me to do with my life. Kind of like it seems that I have kind of glazed over the things that my CREATOR the one who created man and earth is wanting me to do. I feel very venerable to some of satan’s lies of pride, sensuality and passivity. Sometimes i feel fully engulfed in these things and let me tell you it is incredibly hard to pull myself back on the track of getting in the bible and praying consistently with these things taking over my life. I know I want to be a good Christian and a man of God but right now I feel a lack of the Godly discipline to do the things necessary to the be the Christian and missionary that I know I am called to do. I know I don’t want to be a “Hollow Christian” a professed Christian that lives their lives the opposite of how a Christian should. I want to be that leader and I want God to be able to use me to impact other peoples lives if it is his will. But I know that it all starts with repentance and acknowledgment is the first step so I am writing this today to remind me of where I want to be in my life and that I need to repent. I am a sinner and there are things that I need to go to God for forgiveness and I guess you can call this the painful beginning of that process.